


If you keep holding me like this

by SimonaAnglesay



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Drama & Romance, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, Gen, M/M, Technology
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 05:04:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16780159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimonaAnglesay/pseuds/SimonaAnglesay
Summary: This is a Larry/Zarry story. With more than supporting roles for Liam and Niall.Everything seems to be alright and just perfect for the One Direction boys already grown up young men in their 20ties. Louis and Harry at last are together and having a peaceful life of their own. Liam, Niall and Zayn are successful in their careers. There is still " ice to melt" in between after Zayn has left the band but they  have been working on it.There are elements of alternative universe thingy in here - Alpha/Beta//Omega type, but  those Dynamics  don't have such a strong presence in this story. It is mentioned here and there.But then back to the story. Everything seems to be alright at  least until a quiet enemy from the not so far past decides to make their move.





	1. A promise

**Author's Note:**

> My first ever fan fiction for real. And first attempt at writing a story with Alpha/Beta/ Omega dynamics.  
> I'm trying to be modest as I'm not the biggest Directioner nor ''a Larry''.  
> Hope you enjoy.

16th of August 2018

''Spit it out'' the tall dark man said, voice cold and low matching the place they were perfectly. A long corridor, lined up with cells.

Darkness and damp air had sank over everything here making the light from the lamps seem weak.He shifted from one foot to another, trying hard not to look nervous. This place was putting an invisible pressure on him. Maybe that's the point, he thought. Running a hand through his hair he took a deep breath. Then his eyes started focusing better. It had taken him some time to calm the shit down and actually look at him. At him. The one reason he had come to this terrible place.  
He towered over one figure, of a man sitting behind iron bars, his face hidden behind damp messy hair, head bent low.

The figure had stayed quiet when he arrived, hadn't moved even an inch. Then it shifted so much so some light hit its face. A flash of blue, the blue of two eyes were visible for a second and they were gone. A smile replaced them, a bitter smile on red, thin lips.

''Aren't you happy to see me like this?'' the prisoner said, ''Wanted to give you the pleasure...'' he got up slowly taking the few steps, closing the little distance between them. He had a limp, body seemed aching with every move but it didn't seem like bothering him a bit.  
The other man shifted nervously. His face tense, dark eyes shiny, looking anywhere but the wreck of a man in front of him.

''I'm not happy about this Louis and I... I can't help you out this time''.  
The man he called Louis, the prisoner, surprised him. He reached out and grabbed him by the helm of his shirt, dragging him closer a few inches. Louis hissed '' Not for me!''

He looked like a mad man. It wasn't the bars of the cell that were holding him in but Louis himself. He had burned an enormous amount of his strength and sanity so he wouldn't do, wouldn't say something wrong.  
The dark man had a shocked look on his face. He expected a shit storm once he stepped in the building but definitely not this. He let Louis to hold him and even pull him closer, careful not to touch though. He leaned in.

'' I'm begging you Zayn! Not for me!''

The dark man, Zayn shook his head as if he couldn't believe what his ears heard. For the first time Louis was asking him for something, something more important to him than his own freedom and life.

'' I don't know how...don't know where …'' Zayn leaned his forehead to the bars, feeling them cold and damp, feeling Louis' hot breath, they were so close.  
There was a bang, and a heavy door opened in the other end of the corridor, two huge figures of men appearing.

''Lamia'' Louis whispered so low that Zayn wasn't sure if he heard him right.  
The word gave him goosebumps. A short word made his mind flood with so many thoughts that he wanted to set free of his grip.  
''You gave him a promise.''

'' Everything alright sir?'' one of the figures asked.

''And I keep my promises''

Then Zayn had turned to them, fixing his shirt, Louis had let him go. He couldn't make out their faces in this light and to be honest, he didn't want to.  
'' I'm leaving.'' he said and walked away without looking back.


	2. Helpless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This part of the story might be containing disturbing ''stuff''. I'm no master of horrors and yet have the responsibility of warning the readers.

17th of August 2018

It was late afternoon, with the summer heat cooling off slowly and shadows growing by every minute. The mansion looked abandoned but in an odd way still had some quiet pulse beating inside it's walls, behind it's high windows. Not a soul to be seen around, not a living creature. Zayn didn't know which made him more restless. He only wished he was wrong. Meeting Louis was still haunting his thoughts. All that was left untold between them. And it had been already too late.  
Louis imprisoned, all eyes and ears on him.  
No sign left of the times they were young, when they were free and fearless. How fast they have sank into this shit. He couldn't believe it. And now it was just too late. Now it took only one wrong move to make everything worse. He had taken a big risk visiting Louis, a risk too big even for a powerful man as he was.

He sensed it more than he heard it. Sensed it in his very core. A scream, low and muffled. Something that proved him right. They were in the right place and were soon going to find out, if they had come in time.

Liam and Niall exchanged worried looks, they were nervous too, both trying not to show it. They wanted to go in there and get done with the whole situation. Every minute spent by sitting in this car felt like a torture. Not knowing for sure, not doing anything was driving them crazy. Liam guided by Zayn had drove their car on a dirt road and neared the mansion's park, which was more like a full forest and it was a good cover for them. The trees were heavy and thick with leaves at this time of the late summer.

'' You can still change your mind. Niall,..Liam. You don't need to go in there..''

'' No Zayn! We are in this together!'' Niall didn't let him finish his words. Liam was quietly checking his gun. He hadn't talked the whole time, just nodding when talked to and doing what he was asked to do.

''He is right. Three is better than one. And we don't know how many are in there. '' he spoke for the first time '' If they really got him...'' his voice had became uneven but he tried to keep it under control,''...we can't let them get you too.''

'' Let's do this then. Shoot but try not to kill.'' Zayn opened his door and exiting the car he looked towards the mansion with dark eyes.

'' I can't wait to take down at least a few.'' murmured Niall.

Zayn was right, the mansion wasn't completely abandoned. Up from close it was pretty neat and taken good care of. Getting inside wasn't easy making them hope at least getting out would be. They broke in through a door in the backyards. Making noise if only necessary. Then they had to look, to search what they have come for. The mansion was huge. They had the advantage, to attack unexpectedly and they used it, or they wouldn't be able to deal with the men. Lamia's men outnumbered them, fortunately by not too many and they were just too good to be stopped by that witch's dogs.

Zayn stormed into the room, letting an odd pull inside to guide him, which was stupid but he couldn't control it. He had been sick with worry since walking out of Louis' prison. As soon as he stepped in he heard a shriek, a person in a long white coat had jumped against the opposite wall, holding their hands up. It was dark inside, actually dimly lit, reminding him so much if the cells earlier. Zayn shivered. He was sick of the darkness, sick of trying to focus his vision, sick of trying to adapt to it. Then he saw that persons hands and the front of the coat, covered in blood... His jaw tensed, he had to control himself. He didn't lower his gun. Just growled teeth clenched '' Get out!''  
As soon as the person was out he dropped his gun, covering his nose and mouth with the side of his hand. It stenches of death here, in a deep, unbearable way.  
His eyes slowly slid the way that person in a coat had jumped from earlier, searching in the dark. Zayn wasn't ready, he couldn't be ready for what his eyes made out in the darkness of the room. A body curled up in itself, more dead than alive... a glimpse of thin limbs, of pale flesh stained with patches and stripes of blood. His curls, once lovely, once beautiful curls were now drenched in blood and sweat.  
Harry was a heap of his own body, shaking, rocking back and forth uncontrollably..holding in something that was too small for Zayn to see. His sobbing was tearing at Zayn's heart.

'' Harry..love..'' he fought not to throw up his guts, he felt his insides clenching with disgust at what they have done to Harry, sickness almost overwhelmed him. He stepped closer which only made Harry to sob louder. He looked terrible. Naked. His flesh was covered with signs of violence.  
Then he saw it... a tiny part of it, the tiny feet, the tiny top of it's head. A lifeless baby curled up in Harry's arms, it's umbilical cord not broken, still connecting them.

This literally drained the strength out of his limbs. Zayn found himself kneeling. He didn't know how to reach out to Harry anymore, he didn't know how to help.


	3. Let Down

17th of August 2018

'' We need to tell Louis'' said Niall, he was desperately trying to wash away the blood from his shaking hands. They were pretty clean by now but he couldn't stop rubbing the piece of cloth to his skin. He could smell it or he imagined so. Often reminded himself to breath through his mouth, a simple trick he had learned from his mother.  
Harry's blood, he thought, the smell seemed to be all over them. The young man wasn't disgusted, only very much shaken in his mind. And he was trying, trying so hard to calm down.

They were in a large bathroom, one of the many in this horror mansion, all marble and mirrors around, piece of luxury where you could spend an entire day and wouldn't miss any comfort. It was brightly lit inside in contrast with the night's darkness behind the window pane.

''What do you want us to tell him? '' Liam stopped his endless pacing back and forth at last. He was a big man, but now he looked somehow broken, his wide shoulders humped down. '' We fucking failed! We..'' his voice betrayed him. His hands clenched in tight fists he just stood there. It was either giving in and cry or breaking everything on his way. Liam made a few steps towards the door, wanting to get out of this place when Zayn reached for him.

Zayn had been quiet and dark until now. His face was difficult to read. Reaching for Liam, his expression had softened. They were together in this and he understood Liam's torment completely. At first, his friend snapped at his hand, tried to push Zayn away, determined not to let anybody in his personal bubble of misery. Zayn insisted. He simply made the few necessary steps and pulled Liam into a hug.  
Then Liam broke. Burying his face in Zayn's shoulder.

'' Harry didn't deserve this!'' he whined pressing his wet face even closer. He had never felt this upset, this weak and this much vulnerable before. He wanted to forget what had happened this evening. He wished it was only a bad dream.

''Shhhh'' Zayn comforted him.

'' I panicked. Sorry.'' Niall whispered turning off the water. '' My mind can't take this. Too much happened in such a short time. First Louis and now Harry. If they can do this to them...what about us? ''

''You are freaking out for yourself now?!'' hissed Liam turning to the blond lad, Zayn held him back. The man was sensitive right now, would jump on a fight pretty much about anything. ''Are you regretting coming here? Dirtying your hands?''

''No Liam! What I mean is, I thought we don't need to fear them anymore.'' explained Niall, he was patient when it came to his friends. '' I thought they would not hurt any of us.''

''I will take care of this. '' said Zayn letting go of Liam slowly.

Liam turned to face him with a questioning look in his eyes.

''Zayn, no!'' he whispered. '' You can't do this alone! Niall... say something!'' his momentary anger was replaced by worry now.

''Liam is right. We could have refused to come here in the first place.''

Zayn had a knowing expression on his face, smiling warmly with a sad glow in his dark eyes, he sighed. He knew his friends wouldn't let him down, they wouldn't leave him alone in this bloody mess even though their lives were at stake. But he also knew he needed to be alone, so he could collect himself, think more clearly and act efficiently. He had brought them here with him.From this point and forward the less they were involved the better. There was blood now and he had to do his best to prevent more from spilling.

'' What are you going to do?'' Liam's voice was quiet now, stepping back from Zayn.

Silence.

Zayn took out his phone and stare at it for a long minute. Then he returned his look to them. Shifting his gaze between the two confirming.

''You should leave.'' he said calm to his core, but there was an odd coldness in his voice also.  
Coldness that stirred them both. Leaving him here didn't feel right.

''Man. Don't do anything stupid! Don't send us away!'' started Niall but was cut off by Zayn's sharp tone.

'' I know I haven't been the most trustworthy, I let you down...all of you.'' the dark eyed man said.

'' It's in the past, all gone. We are fine now. '' Niall put a hand on his shoulder, tried to look in his eyes and show him, he was honest, ''You don't have anything to prove. Not to us. We are brothers!''

''Louis chose me for a reason.'' Zayn cut him off again, ''Let's face it...alright? I have the power and means. And I promise you, I will take care of everything.''

''Think of your families for God's sake! '' he continued, his voice was heavy with concern ''We were stupid to come here with less than no preparation. But it's not hopeless yet.''

He took a deep breath. Walked to them and gave each a strong hug. Liam trying hard not to burst into tears again, Niall already all red in the face, biting his lower lip mercilessly.

'' I got this! Trust me. OK? ''

''I will contact you when the time is right. Please, go now!'' Zayn begged.

Reluctantly the two made their way to the door. Hardly tearing their eyes from the lonely figure of their friend. They had let Zayn convince them. With him, they knew they couldn't argue, not with that determined look in his eyes.

Zayn was already dialing a number and giving another promising look, he turned his back to them.


	4. Mourning Black and Hospital white_1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry would cry his eyes off, cry for hours. Louis was sorry to admit it to himself but he loved this state of Harry, eyes red, his face all flushed pink and puffy, cheeks, nose, lips. Times like these Harry was the softest, the sweetest and the most beautiful to him. Because Louis knew, Harry had cried for him.
> 
> But this time things were different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you are another chapter. I tried to keep it simple and down to earth. There will be part two as soon as I manage to edit it. I like this process of writing, not too slow, not to fast and I learn this and that.  
> If You have suggestions or comments feel free to share them with me. 
> 
> Lots of hugs ;)

_Oh, I'm living an untruthful life._

_Living it, faking it with your image imprinted in my mind._

_Why didn't love add to my heart but tore off handfuls from it?_

_Why instead of becoming happier and wiser_

_I became a wreck, a madman?_

_Love is sweet, sweeter than honey they said_

_Why do I have only bitterness left on my tongue?_

_Oh, how I wish to start from the beginning._

_How I wish to have another chance with you._

_***************************_

21th of August 2018

None of the boys could have expected what happened next.

News of Louis Tomlinson getting into a fight and then getting arrested for possession of drugs spread like Californian forest fire. Every representative of the media had their own version and most of it was based on bits of ''info leak'' and rumors. He had minor injuries and a cracked wrist, he needed to be taken to the hospital for further examination under the supervision of the police. His family and friends weren't allowed to visit him just yet. Which was odd. Later that day, it was announced that the more serious charges against Louis were dropped, but he still needed to talk to his lawyer and start the process of setting a bail.

Then more bad news followed from over the Atlantic. News of an unfortunate accident. After almost a year long holiday in the Caribbean Harry Styles' private jet crushed somewhere in the middle of the ocean while flying back to UK.

The world was in shock. At first nobody could believe it- the fans, the media, the celebrities. Everybody thought it was some kind of misunderstanding, some kind of bad joke, a mistake. ''No survivors'' the reports said. ''Harry Styles and the crew of the jet, two pilots and a hostess'' were announced lost. Only in hours, nerve wrecking hours and the days that followed them the rescue, the search for any survivors turned into a search for the bodies, for the black box of the jet.

One Direction fans from all over the world held onto the tiny hope that actually Harry hadn't been on board when it crashed. They gathered together in different public places, in small or big groups..city squires, parks, churches and mosques, synagogues and temples. They prayed for Harry's life, they prayed that he would be found alive. They sang all of the One Direction songs, all his songs. No matter the time, day or night, outside people could hear the words of ' Sign of the Times'.

They were still praying when..Quiet until now, a representative of Harry's family made their first and last announcement. They confirmed the news about the crush and the death of Harry.

They had found the black box and investigations of the plain crash had started. Picking up jet's parts from the bottom of the ocean had been difficult, finding any bodies/remains proved to be almost impossible.

*********************************************************************

For how long had he lain on the cold cell floor? How many times?

Oh, he had no idea. This had happened to him before, a few times at least... he had been hard to deal with, too stubborn. But after every lesson/ every beating they would let him lay there. As if they would had this bro code ''let the man pick up the broken pieces of his pride''. Then a doctor would come in, check his injuries, always very quick, very efficient. He or she would patch him up, give him something for the pain, strong enough so he wouldn't pass out completely. And they always left without saying a word, showing no sign of compassion. Louis did not want them to. Maybe he wanted to keep ''the code'' also, just lay there and think of the moment he would get out. Harry would wait for him, first nag him for his stupidity, refuse to talk to Louis anymore.

'' You will be the death of me one day Tomlinson! This time we are done! You hear me Louis?! Do you hear?!''

Harry would cry his eyes off, cry for hours. Louis was sorry to admit it to himself but he loved this state of Harry, eyes red, his face all flushed pink and puffy, cheeks, nose, lips. Times like these Harry was the softest, the sweetest and the most beautiful to him. Because Louis knew, Harry had cried for him.

But this time things were different. He felt it in his bones, literally. Three ''gorillas'' had come in to his cell. To be exact, they were professionals. They knew how to hurt you without leaving visible traces, they wouldn't hit the face, wouldn't break big bones. Louis would call it the art of pain.

Not giving them the chance to catch him and pin him down, he kicked number one in the nuts. He knew to play dirty, as every football player did. Then while number one was on his knees he gave number two a broken nose, blood flowed and grunting noises filled the narrow cell. Number three avoided a miscalculated elbow blow in the guts but got a kick in the knee and a fist on the left cheekbone. Louis knew that it wasn't only the guy's cheekbone that cracked at that moment. Fortunately the adrenaline was high in his blood and he didn't feel any pain. Not yet.

All happened in mere seconds. Getting out from the cell, running down the long corridor.

He knew he couldn't break from this hole of a place but he had to show them he wouldn't give in easily. Not this time.

''Mr Tomlinson, it's enough!'' a quiet but clear voice stopped him in his tracks.

A tall man was standing in the other end of the same corridor, lights were dim but Louis didn't need the lights to recognize him. At that moment the ''gorillas'' had already caught up with him too, grunting ans swearing. They rushed to grab him by the arms but the man stopped them with a sign of his hand. His tall figure in the expensive custom tailored suit didn't suit this dim place. 

''Belford...'' the name left Louis' lips with a low growl.

Louis knew what would follow. A few blows in the guts that would kick the air out of his lungs, one after another. So he couldn't breathe, couldn't say a word.

''He is dead Mr Tomlinson.''

Louis wished he couldn't hear those words. Why hadn't he already passed out? He felt sick. On his knees and hands he tried to stop the feeling of horror that the word ''dead'' had thrown him into. He dry-heaved, his stomach clenched a few times painfully.

''Sir, what next?'' asked one man over Louis.

''Take him back. And don't leave your job half done .'' the man in the suit said leaving.

******************************************************************************************

Why he hadn't doubted even for a second?

_''Lou...wake up!''_

It was so white in here, it hurt his eyes. He was against this all white decoration of the bedroom, white clean walls and ceiling,a huge and fluffy design chandelier, a queen size bed, all the furniture all the textiles. It was a phase Harry was going through. God, he really hated every sunny morning that summer. But Harry's sweet smile was worth it all.

_''Lou wake up!''_

His hair was shifted from in front of his eyes by a gentle touch, cool knuckles were caressing his cheeks next.

_''I need you...''_

Opening his eyes he couldn't stop himself from moaning in pain. The whites of a hospital room. He wished they had left him in his cell, there was no pretending in there at least.

Louis remembered that morning. Their little fight. Harry had woken up early, like really early and while drinking his morning coffee he had gotten new ideas. Changing the places of a few heavy furniture pieces in the living room.

'' For god's sake Harry! You woke me up for this!'' Louis had looked at him not believing his eyes.

Harry was standing there in front of him, all sweaty, long hair in a messy bun, wearing only his boxer briefs and an old t-shirt.

''Come on babe...'' Harry ushered him to grab/give a hand from the other end of the sofa.'' Help me with this and I might prepare breakfast for you.''

''AAAAghhhhhh! Why don't you just try to push it wherever the hell you want to?!'' not happy a bit and still he found himself doing what Harry wanted him to do.

'' Nah. Not good for the floor.''

When they both went down to lift it up, their eyes had met for a second. Harry had flashed him a knowing smirk.


	5. Mourning Black and Hospital white_2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis started sobbing then, he just buried his face in the folds of Liam's shirt even deeper. 
> 
> ''Harry ...Harry is my home...''

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took some time to gather up the courage to add another chapter, the holidays on top of that.  
> Hope you like the new chapter.  
> I'm not good writing dialogs, always becoming too dramatic. But this time I tried to be easy on myself and enjoy the process of writing.  
> Kisses and hugs!

Louis woke up in a hospital room, he did not feel any pain or ache, just saw the cast on his right hand. Sitting up made him dizzy for a second. He hid his face in his healthy hand and tried to breathe, counting backwards from ten to one. Usually it didn't work, he never had the patience just to sit and control his breathing.

**'' The hell with this!''** he cursed to himself.

He hated it every time when he ended up in places like this. Another hospital, another clinic, another private golden cage. He had hoped this time, he wouldn't leave the cell anymore, that he wouldn't wake up again. What was the point if what Belford had said was true?

**''Breathe God dammit!''** he cursed again.

His hands slipped away and rested on his lap now. He had to control himself. He grabbed the fabric of the covers there so strong that his knuckles became white. Feeling a panic rising inside him he decided to get up or at least try. The task took him some time though, whatever they had given him, made his body feel like jello. His legs refused to carry his weight. A few more tries and he manged to go to the bathroom. Barely standing in front of the sink he let the water run, splashed his face a few times with the cold water. Looking up into the mirror he couldn't recognize himself- his face had become skinny and very pale, cheekbones looking sharp, his eyes looked like they had sunk deeper in their sockets, darker and with no trace of their earlier spark.

They hadn't hit him in the face though, they'd never hit his face.

He took a deep breathe not looking into his reflection anymore. He needed to calm down and think, think a way of getting out of here. Maybe in a day or two he would be released but he didn't want to wait that long. Not while Harry was out there in his current condition and he wanted to know the truth, wanted to know more than what Belford had to say.

............................................................................................................................................

''Where to?'' a guard popped in front of him the moment he opened his rooms door.

Louis looked at him from head to toe and back without saying a word. He knew somebody would be guarding him, watching his every move. This time he was lucky, there was only one and a very bored looking one on top of that.

''I need to go to the toilet.'' Louis said.

'' What's wrong with yours in there?'' the guard grunted looking Louis right in the eyes.

'' It won't flush.''

The guard grunted more under his nose and went past him inside, while he was checking things in there, Louis had a look outside his room. The whole floor looked deserted. He had a plan but wasn't sure it would work. When the guard came back he looked at him questioningly.

'' You are not allowed to leave this room.'' there was a frown on the man's face. '' I have to call somebody to fix this.''

''I can't hold until then!'' Louis hissed to him impatiently.

'' You know the rules.''

''Just take me to any restroom and wait behind the door but do something soon because I can't hold it back for long!'' Louis insisted.

Louis would always have his way with the people, this time was no exception. Leading the way from his room to the restroom the guard made the mistake of letting Louis to become aware of the place he was held- doors, windows, elevators, a doctor and a nurse, who ignored them completely. Passing by Louis caught the nurse checking him with the corner of her eye. She was about his age or younger, but she definitely recognized him. There was a spark of curiosity in her dark eyes, something he could use in his benefit.

He rewarded her with a secret tiny smile and hoped she would come back for more.

...........................................................................................................................................................

'' If my supervisor finds out I'm here he will kick me out right away!'' highly alert she just stood there ready to flee the room any moment, '' But oh my God ! You are really Louis Tomlinson!''

She couldn't believe her eyes. Since the moment they have met accidentally she was thinking only about him. Looking for any chance to go to the closed floor. A day ago they had closed the entire B2 floor and moving around was restricted. First doubting. Because he man in front of her looked so broken compared to the strong bratty image of Louis Tomlinson.

''What is your name?'' Louis asked lifting himself up and cringed with some kind of discomfort or pain.

'' Agatha...'' she went on  fixing the pillow behind his back.

Louis found himself smiling to her. He didn't know what to think about this young woman, except that she was pretty brave to come here and talk to him. No body had dared to do that before.

'' Well Agatha...I don't want you to get in trouble.'' he sat up a little bit better, licking up his chapped lips he looked into her eyes, '' But I need your help.''

'' I...I don't know if I can.'' her eyes became wide with fear.

He grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently.

'' I'm held here against my own consent Agatha! You saw that guy ...I can't even take a shit without being followed by him!'' he then pulled her closer and lifted his shirt to show her his bruises.

Her face went pale with shock, she closed her hand over her mouth.

'' They did this to you? ''

Louis only nodded.

'' In the news, it was told you got into a fight and arrested.''

'' And Harry ...and the plane crush?''

'' What crush? Oh my God!'' he froze, '' I don't know anything. I even don't know where I have been for the last few days. I need your help Agatha!''

............................................................................................................................................................

'' What takes so long?''

They heard the guard's impatient voice and the door opened. The man eyed them both suspiciously and took a few steps in. 

'' I need to take blood samples.''

'' What for?'' the guard took a few more steps now eying Louis more carefully, who was laying with eyes closed and cheek flushed.

'' He has fever. Need to test for infections.''

'' But he was checked..'' he wasn't as stupid as he looked.

Agatha held up Louis' file from the foot of his bed. She showed the guard that tests were ran a day ago and that new samples were needed now. The man looked almost convinced but also demanded a second opinion. Then Agatha explained to him that it was Sunday and their only doctor had taken an early lunch break in the restaurant across the street, he would not be happy if he was disturbed for such a minor issue. And at last her supervisor, the head nurse ( who had also taken a break) had put her in charge. Surprisingly all that was mostly true. Agatha proved herself to be a clever young woman. Only in few hours finding her way to take the work of caring for Louis. Though she was warned not to talk to ''the patient''.

'' The laboratory is closing in an hour...and we cannot just prescribe him any antibiotics...'' she went on.

'' Alright! Alright! Just do your job!'' he cut her off.

............................................................................................................................................................

'' Hurry up!'' Agatha pushed the change of clothes and her own pass-card to him. '' He asked me to keep an eye on you. I think he wanted to take a break also.''

Louis couldn't believe his luck but he knew he didn't have the time to think about it, he hurried to change into the jeans and the hoodie that were too big for him. Agatha told him that she had lent them from a coworker who had forgotten to lock his locker. He put on a cap and thought he was ready to leave when she stopped him.

''Here! I think you will need this.'' Then she placed a cellphone in his palm.

He was speechless. A stranger was taking risks and getting in very big trouble to help him and in exchange she wanted nothing.

''Oh, I do not know what to say...this!''

''You don't need to. I will say that you stole it from me and locked me in the bathroom.'' She whispered hurriedly. ''You need to go now! Not much time.''

'' Thank you Agatha! Thank you very much!''

…............................................................................................................................................................

Louis needed to be fast. After making the phone call he threw it way somewhere on his way, he ran. They would find out about Agatha and his escape, they would try to track him down. He knew very well they would find him eventually, but first he wanted answers, answers MM (Modest Management) wouldn't give to him.

Luckily it was still summer and streets were full of people. He needed to be careful though, try to avoid crowds where people could recognize him.

He had chosen a parking lot quite far from the clinic he was held, he didn't want to make it easy for MM to find him. Let them go crazy and have some panic. Past half way he realized he had started limping, it had not bothered him earlier. He had to slow down not to look any suspicious and attracts unwanted attention. 

When he arrived to the spot he did not need to wait long. Liam arrived only a few minutes after he had entered the parking lot. He was not alone in the silver Toyota, there was a woman siting behind the wheel. She did not look familiar. She did not give him more than a glance.

Opening the car door Liam waved to him.

''You can trust her. Now get in!''

Louis had tons of questions but was intimidated by the stranger's presence. He sat in the back looking everywhere but seeing nothing at all, feeling so small. He tired to keep the feelings bubbling inside of him under control. He was afraid of completely losing it. 

'' Liam tell me what happened …''

'' Not now Louis. We need to get somewhere safe first. The entire media of the world has been after us since the last few days!'' Liam seemed to be avoiding turning back and looking at him. That made Louis more restless. ''Niall is distracting some right now and I had to leave my own house in the trunk of a car!''

''Just tell me what happened because I'm going crazy! What did Zayn do? What is this plane crush story all about?'' 

'' We were too late Louis...''

''What do you mean with _too late_?'' Louis insisted.

Silence descended in the car. In the background only the smooth purr of the engine and the muffled sounds of the outside world.

'' I don't know how to tell this to you...'' Liam continued after a long sigh, '' Yuva was empty, Lamia was gone, none of our contacts would help...''

''Cut it short Liam! Don't you see you are just torturing him?!'' the woman behind the wheel talked for the first time. Her voice was unusually even and calm.

'' I'm sorry.''

Louis flinched hearing those few words.

'' Harry miscarried … They had forced it...'' Liam was so hard controlling his emotions, trying to keep talking, giving Louis some kind of an explanation, '' Harry was very weak when we got there, he had lost lots of blood.''

'' You mean...Belford told me Harry is dead and you are telling me...''

'' I'm sorry Louis. We couldn't do anything for the babe...''

'' No!'' came a growl from the back seat, '' You are lying to me also! You want be to believe in this nonsense!'' there was a click and shifting, Louis had opened his safety belt and was reaching to open the door.

'' I'm driving! And nobody leaves the car!'' the woman growled back.

Yet again Louis tried his way, the door wouldn't open, it was locked. Then he swore out loud and let it be.

…............................................................................................................................................................

She drove to a no name motel somewhere in the suburbs and reserved a room. 

''Here you are the key-card. I'm gonna get us something to eat and drink.'' Accompanying them to their room's door she turned to leave.

Liam only nodded and whispered a soft ''thank you'' to her. He was carrying a duffel bag which going inside he was about to put it on the single bed but Louis grabbed the bag impatiently. He opened it and started immediately digging in the stuff inside. When he found the change of clothes he started taking off the '' borrowed ones''. Liam hissed seeing the bruises he had got.

'' How is your arm?'' the brown eyed man asked.

''It's fine...'' Louis answered shortly taking a painkiller from the bag. He looked exhausted, face pale and dark circles under his eyes. He knew Liam didn’t believe him, he wasn’t the type to pretend either, but he just did not feel like talking about pain right now. He had been rude, he had to admit. In his suffering and confusion he had only caused more pain. 

Liam had been amazingly efficient for the short time given to him. He had tricked the paparazzi, found a ride, had the time to prepare him this bag and all Louis had asked him to bring. Liam even had had the time to call Louis lawyer. And when Louis thought about it … Liam could have refused to come.

He sat on the bed letting out a heavy sigh. 

''I'm sorry Li...just..I'm in so much pain...My head feels like it's gonna explode!''

''Hey! Hey!'' Liam sat next to him and hugged him gently. ''I know Lou. You must have gone through hell. Lets calm down first, OK?''

Louis just shivered in his embrace. He felt so fragile and small at this moment that Liam wanted to comfort him, wanted to give him hope. After the accident of the mansion Liam had become a nervous wreck himself. He kept having nightmares of when they went in to the half dark room where Harry was laying in his own blood. Not believing his eyes he would look for the switch, as if turning on the lights would prove him wrong, the light would change everything...he would keep on searching, eyes strained, hands sliding on the wall. Nothing. He never found it. And a silent horror would grow inside him, mercilessly reducing a big man to a small scared boy. 

''You should rest now...God you are all shaking!'' Liam dragged the thin cover of the bed and covered Louis with it. '' Take a nap, I'll watch over you.''

'' There is no time for this...'' Louis tried to shake the feeling of safety and warmth off himself.

''There always is.'' His friend just hugged him even more tight, '' You will feel much better, believe me! Your lawyer is working on this. You will be able to go back home soon.''

Louis started sobbing then, he just buried his face in the folds of Liam's shirt even deeper. 

''Harry ...Harry is my home...''

''I know Lou...I know...''

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm using some foreign words here and there in my story.  
> Yuva in my story means a nest.  
> Lamia ( in ancient Greek mythology, was a woman who became a child-eating monster after her children were destroyed by Hera, who learned of her husband Zeus's trysts with her; a mythical monster supposed to have the body of a woman, and to prey on human beings and suck the blood of children.) is the nick name I gave to the evil woman in this story.


	6. Garden of Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He had tried to prepare himself for this, but how anybody could prepare themselves for meeting Harry after almost years of separation and radio silence ?  
> ''It's great to see you again!'' pushing his shyness and anxiety away he crossed those few meters between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a chapter I wanted to be soft and light. During my work on it a patch of ''darkness'' came up. I let it be.  
> There is some Zarry and short Larry. Some of Zayn's IG posts earlier this year gave me inspiration to sit and write this. I'm taking what I want and add some of my spices.   
> It's far from perfect and open for editing in the future.   
> And by the way I would like to ''meet'' people I could share and talk about stories, ideas and prompts.

June 11th 2018

About three months ago

Zayn coudn't believe his eyes, seeing Harry entering his yard through the back door. He stood up immediately and started taking the too large gardening gloves off his hands.

All dough prepared he just froze then and there, standing in the middle of the patches of fresh soil for his vegetables and flower beds. He was only in his colorful shorts and sneakers, exposing his tattooed upper body completely to the sun.

Zayn had not believed when a few days ago Louis had sent him a message that said they would pass by and say hello. Louis had been trying to arrange a small reunion for a while. Always something would come up though. And their situation was very delicate lately also. Louis and Harry at last moving together and giving it a serious shot. Niall and Liam too busy with their own projects and lives. He himself working on a new album. Flying between USA and UK every few weeks. Zayn had his excuses. He really didn't know how to behave around any of the boys anymore. There had been an invisible connection between them before and it had gotten broken. Often he found himself helpless fixing it, just picking up the phone and dialing a few numbers had proved to be impossible.

He had tried to prepare himself for this, but how anybody could prepare themselves for meeting Harry after almost a year of separation and radio silence ?

'' It's great to see you again!'' pushing his shyness and anxiety away he crossed those few meters between them.

Eyes not seeing, ears not hearing. His knees had become weak and heart was pounding like crazy. He was ''not'' crying, he was ''not'' holding onto his friend with the tightest embrace.

Embracing Harry felt like heaven. Embracing him felt like being able to breathe again.

It was the perfect summer day with the sea breeze, blowing now and then, taking off the heat's edge just enough.

They had decided to spend the day in the garden: Zayn showing places/things around, continuing his work for a while and talking to Harry, who was mostly playing in the dirt and fooling around as he had no gardening experience. 

Sometimes Zayn would become quiet and shy, avoiding any eye contact. Then Harry would say one of his ridiculous jokes and make both of them laugh for many minutes.

It was only the two of them in the summer house. Zayn had fortunately given a free day to his housekeeper Daye earlier, who was a discrete lady in her early sixties but having her in the house would have felt equally embarrassing as having his mom around watching him. She had prepared food for him and put notes that would remind him to eat. Daye had taken putting some extra meat on Zayn's bones as her personal mission.

Harry was popping cherry tomatoes like candy. He had abandoned his shoes somewhere and walked barefoot, enjoying the feeling of well kept/mowed grass. His first few steps had made him almost moan of pleasure.

'' God! This feels amazing!'' He just wanted to stand there and enjoy the feeling, the lightness and freshness of the moment.

When he opened his eyes he saw Zayn reaching out to him, he had a little flower in his hand.

''Thank you love.''

They ended up drinking tea and eating sandwiches in the veranda. Maybe because of the fresh air, maybe because of the work done which wasn't anything much really, they felt so hungry and everything tasted amazing.

Once in a while Zayn looked over him. He couldn't believe Harry had come to him at last. He had worried about his friend, Harry had Louis, Harry was strong but at the same time he was very sensitive and fragile also.

There was something different in Harry that day. Something he couldn't put a finger on at first. Some kind of glow and softness. Nothing was missing though– Harry was still the young man with the widest smile and most charming dimples ever. Yes, he was a bit too tall for an Omega and a bit too muscular even. But his whole body looked like fitting perfectly into its' own shape at last.

Whatever it was, it only added to Harry's aura of light and charm.

He wore a wide rimmed summer hat. His hair had grown incredibly long and reaching past his shoulders. Lose cotton shirt on top and shorts. Harry looked more content and happy then ever before.

Harry caught him looking over him with searching eyes a few times. He tried hard not to smile too wide and revealing his secret too soon.

'' Almost four months now...''

Jumping up Zayn almost spit off his tea...it made him cough, wiping the liquid off his mouth with the back of his hand, he looked over Harry with wide, surprised eyes. He found himself looking at Harry's sheepish smile first and slowly his eyes moved to his middle.

''Oh!''

''Not much to see yet.'' Harry put a hand over his abdomen.'' But already messing up with my hormones and head.''

''Oh...''

''Louis and I would like you to become her godfather. Of course, if you want it too..''

''Oh!''

Then Harry started laughing hard, not being able to hold back anymore. He walked up to Zayn and knelt in front of the still speechless man, so their eyes met perfectly. Harry slowly took Zayn hands into his and squeezed them gently. His every move was so careful and gentle, as if Zayn was a wild animal that would get easily scared and flee away. But Harry's eyes had long ago put a spell on him. 

'' You may think about it, OK? We could ask Liam...''

''No way!'' he shook the shock of the news off himself. '' You asked me first!'' a wide smile had appeared on his lips, a smile that lit up his eyes bright. '' Man! I don't know what to say...This...This is amazing! ''

''For starters **Congratulations!** '' Harry suggested.

''Yes! Yes! Congratulations! Thousands of congratulations!''

Zayn pulled him closer, so close that there were only inches between them.

''It is all your plan, right ?'' he became his serious self in a blink of an eye.

'' Of course, it is! You silly!''

'' This won't fix anything Harry...'' Zayn's voice was serious as well. '' You shouldn't..''

'' I want to!'' Harry whispered, '' We have missed you so much. Louis would never admit, but I know.''

They were silent for a while, just looking in each others eyes, holding hands. Arguing seemed useless at that moment. Zayn would always remember their long conversations and plans for the future, if he refused now, if he argued on, he wouldn't help it but sound fake. Even though the loner of the band he had secretly confessed it to Harry many times- he wanted them in his life, he wanted to be in their lives. He just needed breaks once in a while from all. It was a miracle of its own that he had survived so many years in the band. The MM, the paparazzi, the eyes on them 24/7, the constant anxiety, all had been eating him from inside. If it hadn't been for Liam, Harry, Louis and Niall, he would had gone mad long ago.

It wasn’t easy to leave the band. Not because they were literally in the middle of a tour. Making up his mind took him tremendous amount of courage. But he needed a break, no matter what. To the last moment only Louis knew of his intentions, Zayn told him, it would be temporary. The media had also said so, it would be temporary...Until the day MM changed its mind, they saw this break as a damn good opportunity to refresh the band's image. The media and the fans loved the drama and mystery, actually not all the fans liked it, many teenage girls threatened to commit suicide...Many theories and speculations came up that were and would be talked about for months and years. MM liked it and did the impossible to keep it so. They boys were forbidden to contact their band mate, Zayn wasn't welcome back anymore. And yet his part of the act wasn't complete, he had to play the unstable one, to be his loner true self...to be the traitor.

The boys couldn't believe it, especially Harry, he cried for hours and every next concert felt like torture to him. He and Zayn had become very close. The rest of the boys knew it, they were there to support Harry.The emptiness that was created in the middle of the band was like a bleeding wound. They had to act cool, they had to continue the show. 

Remembering those and not frowning was impossible and yet Zayn couldn't help himself. His smile became tight, his eyes- just so sad that Harry couldn't stand looking into. Harry just hugged him very tight.

''Just wait! You are going to do lots of baby-sitting.''

''I can't wait to see that! Me baby-sitting!?''

They both started giggling. 

''No smoking!Or!'' Harry made him a warning signs with his index finger.

''None at all?''

'' Not around Susan.''

''What a boring name! the godfather must step up and save this baby!'' 

They became silent again. There were the signs of worry in Harry too. He have been going through big changes himself and Zayn didn't want to be nosy. He just wanted to be present and happy. 

''You promise ?''

''I promise.''

.............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

It was late evening already, shadows have grown bigger and darker. There was a chill in the air and the earlier nice breeze had turned too cold to stand. Harry with a soft blanket around his shoulders ran barefoot towards the car that was waiting in the driveway.

''Hurry up babe...'' Louis sat on the driver's seat, he just waved to Zayn who stood in the veranda and wouldn't come closer. His dark haired friend just waved back.

''Hullow!'' Harry greeted Louis, then he turned back to Zayn, '' I'm borrowing this and never giving back!''

Even though it was getting darker they could see him smiling wide.

''So things went well?'' Louis waited for him to put his seat bealt on and reached forwards to put the heat on, then he saw something odd. '' Where are your shoes Harry?''

His beloved was just trying to make himself as comfortable as possible, adjusting blanket and seat belt.

'' I lost them.'' he answered as if it was the most usual thing in the world.

Louis sighed knowing well asking further would be of no use. He started the car.

''We are buying you new ones then!''

Harry just reached for him and planted a peck on his cheek.

'' Thank you, love!'' he whispered. '' I had great time.'' 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MM stands for Modest Management in this story.


End file.
